Taxes done: now, the fun

It's the annual contemplation of what, exactly, is the stupidest question I was asked while filling out my taxes. The early favorite was the state of New York, which wanted to know if I had, during the year, experienced any depreciation on an asset purchased prior to 1960.

On the other hand, DC wanted to know if I was some sort of a lawyer. And whether I was a first-time homebuyer. Also, am I in any way disabled? Might I have lived abroad for any portion of the year?

That seemed hard to beat. But New York swung back at the last minute with a roundhouse punch: did I engage, at any point during the year, in the production of maple syrup? Yes, that's it's own tax category in the Empire State. As the descendant of a long (long, long, long, long) line of New Yorkers, I have to wonder, couldn't they have found something a little less foolish to subsidize? Like, say, a crash program to put Groucho glasses on the Statue of Liberty?

Comments

I find you can soften the blow by using your refund (if any..) to undermine government excess. 'Frinstance, this year I used my returned income to buy a copy of Capitalism and Freedom for anyone who promised to read it cover to cover.

Posted by Sam | April 16, 2008 2:41 AM

I was helping my mom with her taxes this weekend, and my favorite was: In the state of Michigan, if you give birth to a stillborn child, that's a $150 tax credit.

I just hope the supply is inelastic, otherwise, they're increasing the quantity supplied...

Posted by Matthew | April 16, 2008 6:36 AM

I remember in California there was a question as to whether you received income from rewards given in exchange for information leading to the apprehension of criminals. There were other strange ones on that form as well...

Me, I "punted" on my returns: I plan on making use of the automatic extension one receives for living abroad.

Posted by Zevatron | April 16, 2008 6:46 AM

The simplest (and perhaps the only) way to achieve tax simplification would be to require all present and past legislators, at all levels, to prepare and file their own tax returns without professional help. Eliminating withholding from their salaries might also help them understand why many of us are not thrilled when they propose to increase our taxes.

I wonder how many sugar maple tree plug hole auditors New York employs.

Posted by Ed Reid | April 16, 2008 7:24 AM

I'd just like to point out that you don't have to do it this way, with complicated excemptions. Next time just take a pencil and a paper tax form and fill it out. Don't claim any excepmtions or anything. You'll be done in 5 minutes. See, wasn't that easy? It isn't the fault of the government, it is your fault for using TurboTax.

Posted by freddiemac | April 16, 2008 9:18 AM

For my federal return, TurboTax asked me if I had produced any alcohol that was used to power a vehicle.

So, if you make drinkin' booze, a revenuer comes and confiscates your still; if you make drivin' booze, they give you a tax break.

Posted by Kyle | April 16, 2008 9:19 AM

While everyone enjoys making fun of these things the reason they are there is because it is what we want.

Everyone is for tax reform and simplification until there own special break is threatened. Why do we not get reform? Because no one is willing to take the chance that the reform will make them better off.

Posted by spencer | April 16, 2008 10:19 AM

Ahh, wise remark MrSpencer. And just how do we s'pose those stupid subsidies and exceptions got put into the TaxCode? Because someone hired a lobbyist, yes. And that someone expects to also hire accountants and maintain bookkeepers, wouldn't ya bet. So who would that person be? Dollars to Donuts it's a Republican!!! Who likely spends a helluva lot of energy bitching about....the TaxCode. And when they're in office....screwing it up further.

Posted by JohnMcC | April 16, 2008 10:57 AM

JohnMcC,

Obviously you are not referring to the EITC, personal deductions, exclusions for Samoan tuna packers, etc.

Posted by Ed Reid | April 16, 2008 11:54 AM

Everyone is for tax reform and simplification until there own special break is threatened. Why do we not get reform? Because no one is willing to take the chance that the reform will make them better off.

Another way to think of is: 'All those other tax breaks, they are all shifting the tax burden off of others and on to me'.

Second point: spending = taxes + deficit
Want less taxes? Push for spending cuts.

Third point: What's our biggest discretionary expenditure? I nominate the occupation of Iraq.

Posted by amorphous | April 17, 2008 12:57 PM