There are a lot of useless kitchen products out there. I find it hard, for example, to imagine anyone making quesadillas often enough to justify a quesadilla maker. The electric egg poacher also seems like it demands an improbably high, and frequent, desire for poached eggs, as well as a worrying inability to heat water in a saucepan.
But this is absolutely the least useful appliance I have ever seen: the electric martini maker, which can provide them shaken, as well as stirred. If you are not strong enough to either shake, or stir, your martinis, you probably already require a home health aide who should do it for you. If you can lift the bottle to the rim of the cocktail shaker to pour in the gin, you can stir it around a little before you guzzle it.
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Megan,
Can we have recipie day, can we Megan, can we?
My contribution:
Mashed Colliflower made with an immersion blender
1. Steam head of colliflower for 10 min
2. Place in container and add salt, minced garlic, butter and sour cream to taste.
3. Use immersion blender to blend to the consistancy of mashed potatoes
4. Consume
Additions to the above recipe:
Grate some smoked cheddar - about 1C worth. Smoked is MUCH better than regular.
Add cheese to the container before you blend (btw, a food processor works well for this, too). Cut back on the butter, too, since the cheese has plenty of dairy in it.
Pour into 9X15 casserole dish (or equivalent).
Bake at 350 until the top turns golden, and contents start to bubble. You can cover the top with shredded cheese prior to baking, if you'd like.
Let stand 20 minutes or so before serving. Not low fat, but very low-carb - and very delicious.
Further advice for said recipe:
Make sure to review the "ironic speaking voice" section of your cookbook before attempting said recipe.
I think you have hit the nail on the head as to why the price is knocked down from $190 to $63!
It could be useful if we are so blitzed that we cannot figure out how to stir or shake our martinis safely. But in this case, would we really need to be drinking more?
Unsolicited feedback, and sorry for the bluntness: all your today's posts kinda sucked. As did most of them in the last few days.
I know, I know... why don't I just shut up about it and go read some other blog? Well, I'm doing that. But I like the non-sucky Asymmetrical Information.
Whatever it is that's causing the streak of uninteresting posts, I hope things get better soon.
My money is on wedding planning.
I hope you're right - at least there's an end in sight.
I usually read the posts in RSS, so I don't see the comments. But this made me laugh, to where I actually came to the site to say, "LOL", because I did.
I guess everyone else is having a better day and didn't need a laugh.
Feel free to continue to comment on electric martini mixers. This cube-rat needs a chuckle every now and then.
I think it might be useful for someone who hosts cocktail parties solo. The machine can do the shaking while the host makes other drinks or sets out the canapes. Someone shaking a manual shaker has his hands occupied and can't do much else.
I don't like cocktail parties, though. Or martinis. So the thing would be useless to me.
I'm looking forward to having insurance pay for my home health aide who can make my martinis.
I'm pretty sure that's its in the public option.
Ha! I came to the comments to LOL too.
Au Contraire, Ms. McArdle! The electric martini maker is priceless when you've had a few more than you should, but not nearly as many as you want.
Let me spell it out for you. Martini manufacture requires a modicum of coordination -- coordination that just may not be available at, oh, say 3:24 AM, when the party is just approaching a new and interesting phase.
It is at just such a time that any hitch in alcoholic beverage beverage can spell disaster. And yet, the martini, with its air of bonhomie, sophistication, and gaiety, is the only beverage that will do at such a time. Thus, the electric martini maker.
YThe electric martini maker is much like the S-IVB third stage of the Saturn V rocket of Apollo fame -- uncelebrated, unappreciated, yet utterly necessary to propel your party beyond earthly bonds to embrace the infinite possibilities of the universe beyond.
This staid little soldier (the electric martini maker, not the S-IVB third stage) steps into the breach when you go the way of all flesh when overindulged. No need to fear an libation improperly manufactured due to temporary alcoholic suppression of fine motor skills! Automation allows you to focus your flagging abilities where they are most needed -- at becoming the life and soul of the party!
I recommend the purchase of at least two copies of this little engineering marvel (again, the electric martini maker, not the S-IVB third stage) so you will have a backup should the primary fail.
Do you own stock in the manufacturer or something? ;-)
What's your address and when are you having your next party? I've been practicing my martini-sipping exercises and the guns are ready for some off-the-hook party action!
I am guessing the idea is that you are making so many martinis that you would get tired shaking them all. This is not unrealistic at a very large house party.
Spoken like such a girl Megan. It's a gadget, it doesn't have to be useful.
No, but it does have to be cool(for some sufficiently geeky definition of "cool"). Do you really think this qualifies?
Quesadillas are delicious, and I have no objection to making them frequently. That said, a specialized appliance for the task?
Yes, this wasn't a comment on quesadillas, which are delicious. It was a comment on the minimum efficient scale needed to make a quesadilla maker repay the initial investment. I could make quesadillas every night, and I would still be just fine with putting them in a nonstick pan, or oven, and then cutting them by hand . . .
Quesadilla-making frequency, in my mind, has nothing to do with whether one would own a quesadilla-maker. Quesadillas, to which my parents were introduced after ALMOST TWENTY YEARS of living in California (what can I say? They hailed from Wisconsin originally), are the grilled-cheese sandwich of choice around my place - but just as I'd never think to buy a grilled-cheese-sandwich-maker because I own a perfectly good and easy-to-clean skillet, I'd never consider buying a quesadilla-maker - because I own a perfectly good and easy-to-clean skillet.
In the first place, I am not at all sure using this gadget would be any quicker than using the regular shaker. With a manual shaker, it only takes a second or two to complete the task, though sometimes the lid is difficult to remove.
In an ideal world, one would get the machine and have the home health aide use it. Wouldn't want the help to get a repetitive stress injury and then himself need a home health aide.
Ok, I'm an idiot. I love me a poached egg, and it looks like the easiest thing in the world to make. But when I try to do it, the egg diffuses all over. I'm left with a poached egg-yolk, a few scraps of white that managed to stay together enough for me to scoop up, and a messy pan.
What am I doing wrong.
OK. Firstly, start with a fresh egg. If you don't have one, don't bother - make something else with your egg. If an egg is sufficiently stale that the white spreads everywhere, it's not poachable. Second, bring a saucepan of water to the boil. Add a dash of vinegar (the acid helps stablisise the white). Third, turn the heat off and wait until there is no more water motion (boiling action will break up the white). Four, crack the egg into the water. Leave for a minute or so to let the egg partially set. Firth, bring back to a gentle simmer - this should also push the egg off the bottom of the saucepan where it will have adhered to. Finally, use a slotted spoon to remove when the white is fully set and the yolk is just not quite cooked to your preference. Like quite a few other simple cooking techniques, it takes a few goes to get right but once you've mastered it you have a simple skill that surprisingly few otherwise good cooks can manage.
Thanks a lot (and to all the others who gave me poaching tips)! Maybe I'll have it for breakfast tomorrow. At the very least, I'll try.
Excellent description, though I'd add that if you're still having trouble, you can try lowering it into the water with a (non slotted) spoon.
While I wouldn't use this for a Martini, it might come in handy for the arm-killing 5-10 minutes it takes to properly shake a Ramos Gin Fizz, though I can't see how it would shake hard enough.
@vegemighty -- You are not alone. I have the same problem with my poached eggs.
Also, when I was growing up in the 70's my Mom used to make me poached eggs in a Salton electric egg poacher. I saw it at her house several months ago and had a fond flashback to perfectly poached eggs. Too bad I don't have room for another electric thing in my kitchen.
For egg poaching, I highly recommend silicone poach pods: http://www.amazon.com/Fusionbrands-Poach-Pods-Set-Green/dp/B000P6FD3I/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=home-garden&qid=1256862860&sr=8-1
For poached eggs, the water should be just below boiling so that the bubbles don't spread the egg around.
When you put the egg in the water do it by cracking the egg and then put the cracked side down into the water and slowly open it. This way the white won't spread so much. You will loose some though.
Also, fresher eggs seem to spread less.
When I married my wife in her home town in the Philippines, one of the presents we received was an electric hotdog waffle iron. Yes, you read that correctly. That is, a waffle iron specially constructed so that you can make a hotdog bun shaped waffle, with a hotdog perfectly suspended in the middle of it. All nicely constructed in China on teflon coated aluminum.
A few days after the wedding, we decided that we HAVE to TRY the thing. It worked pretty well. She ate hers with cane syrup, I ate mine with spicy mustard. It has been dormant many month since.
I later heard that the gift-giver got it for free as a bonus upon buying a washing machine, wich actually made me feel a lot better.
I am also reminded of a time in my youth where my mom burst into laughter upon finding an advertisement for a $300 electric duck plucker beeing marketed to some subset of the LL Bean / Cabellas crowd.
But my all time favorite is the gasoline-powered 2 stroke engine blender. I have to admit I wanted one just to annoy my pretentious friends. Imagine a Homelite chainsaw engine, professionally rigged to an Osterizer. Blue smoke and the smell of falling timber as you make margaritas or mango smooothies. But sensibilities prevailed.
I am actually in the market for a sensible electric egg poacher. 2-4 eggs for breakfast every day. Until recently, I had never imagined that my rice cooker would be the most labor-saving appliance in the kitchen.
Never underestimate the diversity of interest in markets for niche goods - it has made many a rich person. Somewhere in America, somebody is sending off money for an electric duck plucker or martini maker. I just wish I could figure out what might be the next craze.
Just so you know, I am now obligated to point Stephen Green at this post, just to see his reaction.
Megan, I was wondering if you have a recommendation for a good home cappuccino/espresso machine at a reasonable price. I looked through your archives and couldn't find anything.
I started to ask about this last week, or even send an email, but decided not to do that. I'm thinking of getting my wife a new one for Christmas as she uses it daily and the one she uses is falling apart. I'd like something in the less-than-$150 range if that's possible, I know I can get a super-mongo $500 machine that would be just peachy, but I just can't bring myself to slap down that kind of cash for a glorified coffee maker.
I trust your appliance recommendations - I've bought 2 coffee makers on your recommendation and been pleased with both, so I appreciate any feedback you can give.
Oh, I should have said I was leaning towards this DeLonghi EC155 Espresso Maker but the reviewers give it bad marks for the steaming wand being too close to the counter-top and insufficient clearance between the grounds basket and the drip tray to put a regular cup.
This DeLonghi EC270 15-Bar-Pump Espresso Machine, Black and Stainless is supposedly better on those 2 fronts but is a good bit more expensive at $200 retail.
Any feedback (from anyone with experience with these machines) is appreciated.
Megan,
First off, contrary to the commenter above, the Electric Martini Shaker is useless to the over-indulger, as it requires far more coordination to operate than a manual shaker (Boston or Cobbler).
That said, when I reviewed it, I found it does have one VERY useful application: The making of Ramos Gin Fizzes. You have to shake a Ramos for several minutes to make it right, which leads to frostbite and tennis elbow when done manually. An electric shaker makes this an almost practical cocktail.
I always found the bagel slicer a mystery, myself.
On the flip side, the one device that sounds like a useless appliance that I find indispensable is the salad spinner. Fastest route to crispy greens, ever.
Well, since this has turned into this kind of comment thread: how do you store the greens to keep them crisp? Mine wilt so fast. There's really only so much salad I'm willing to take in a short amount of time.
I want to speak up in defense of the quesadilla maker. If you have room to store it when not in use--and let's face it, it's not in use very often--a quesadilla maker is pretty cool. You can't do the heated-top-and-bottom thing, and get the right pressure, on your stovetop.